Thursday, September 28, 2006

Kest Workshop, Part 3. Also my achy breaky butt…


Ran the lake yesterday twice – 3.5 miles. Wasn’t much of a problem (which speaks volumes for improved cardio-vascular condition.) But my knees sound a little mushy today, which interfered with practice this morning. Maybe the extra work my ass was doing to support my legs in the standing poses is responsible for the pronounced soreness in my cheeks.

The Kest mp3 workout was challenging, of course, and I did a lot of resting. Duckie woke up and kept me company. I felt like I could have used more time with the hips – so tomorrow I think I’ll focus on them. And maybe that will help the hamstrings release a little, too.

So I’ve been up for a few hours already. Noodles for breakfast – yeah I know it’s weird, but I’m out of oatmeal. And it seems like the stranger my food choices, the better my body responds. Losing a bit too much so far this week – so maybe I’ll indulge with some chocolate later on. I’ve still got some extra-dark stuff which has a lot less sugar than the usual suspects.

******************notes, continued*******************

About the long, slow and deep sequence: “You can do this every now and then when you feel like you need a good deep stretch. And you know, sometimes you just don’t want to do a fucking lunge.”

Saturday evening or Sunday morning, I can’t remember which, I came to the realization that appearing calm is not at all the same as being calm. Probably pretty obvious, but it was new to me and immensely clarifying for all aspects of my life.

Me: Wisdom and truth are inside and outside and everywhere. But the "twists in your karmic rope" don’t always allow them to flow properly. In so many cases that knowledge, that awareness is right there – but it’s blocked. So the less reactive I can be and the less tension I can generate, the more that rope untwists, letting some of that clarity and understanding reach me, instead of waiting on the other side of tension and stress.

“Emotion expresses itself through the body.” It was like hearing myself speak in someone else’s voice. (I remember this post, especially, from a couple of months ago: "It reminds me that for us, for humans, emotion expresses itself through our bodies. And I think if that flow is easy and open, even if the emotion is hard and overwhelming, it will, eventually, pass on. And the good stuff replicates itself. Our bodies want to be in love, and not just with our partners – with everything.")

K: “Falling is a valid human condition. Why do we avoid it? There’s nothing wrong with it; I hope you fall. Falling and not-falling are the same things.”

About the differing opinions viz. menstruation and inversions: “75 years ago, women weren’t allowed to practice yoga at all. So how can we really know what effect a shoulderstand will have on a menstruating body?” His point was that it’s up to each individual to find out what effects poses will have on our bodies. [I have, by the way, tried a shoulderstand during the last day or two of my cycle. Screwed me up right good, it did. Other inversions, such as they are, seem to be fine.]

Kest helped us maintain some awareness of time passing – which can be useful in a two-and-a-half-hour long class. “It goes so quickly,” he said, “especially after thirty. Time just goes so freaking fast. Savor this, savor this moment, this pose, because we’re not coming back to it.”

Brian (my husband) on Sunday morning: Why don’t you want to go back?
Me (whiny): Because everyone seems to know each other. I don’t know anyone. I’m next to Ms. Gumby. I don’t have pretty yoga clothes. I can’t bind. I feel like I’m in 7th grade gym class.”
Brian: I think you’re beautiful.

“Ultimately, yoga is about healing and nurturing yourself. When I unroll my mat and do my practice, this is the time I spend on myself.” I couldn’t help but wonder what his practice looks like; I watched him demonstrate a couple of poses during the class and his graceful, effortless strength were amazing. The rest of the time I was looking at my foot, my hand, or the mat. Or Ms. Gumby.

I caught a cold. Brian: “You’re in a room with 100 other sweating bodies for two and a half days – you caught a cold? Really? Imagine that." When I got back Sunday, Duckie and I took a nice long nap in the afternoon – and I was still exhausted.

During the summer between my junior and senior years in high school, I went to work and study at a ranch along the Nevada/California border. Towards the end of the summer, I went out to cow camp to hike and camp with a couple of the other students. The hike back to the ranch was 18 miles. This weekend was harder than that hike.



Yogamum said...

What a trip you've been on! Really great insights!

Brian sounds like a keeper. How sweet.

Wow, you studied at Deep Springs? How cool!! I just read an article about Deep Springs in the New Yorker (I think). Really fascinating. I didn't know they let girls go there -- is that just in the summer?

andi said...

Yogamum -

Yeah, I think I'll keep him for a while. He thinks I'm nuts, but apparently in a good way.

Deep Springs college had female students out the summer I went - it was the first time they tried it. I don't know if they've done it since. It was ... er... interesting. That's a safe way to put it ;) Blows me away that anyone other than myself has heard of it!

Kiki said...

Brian is right. You *are* beautiful.

James said...

"...appearing calm is not at all the same as being calm."

(laughs) So so true. I LOVE IT!!!


"Our bodies want to be in love, and not just with our partners – with everything."

Good stuff.

Man, try not to worry too much about what Ms. Gumby is doing. You're doing it and that's all that matters. I'm proud of you. :)

Oh yeah and I loooooove dark chocolate.

James said...

I just wanted to...You will not give up on yourself and that is awesome. Keep up the great work girl. :)

oldwhitelady said...

The note about jogging reminds me I haven't jogged in some time. You've made me realize I need to get out there. It sounds like the yoga clinic is worth attending!

andi said...

James - I'll make a deal with you - I won't give up on either one of us if you don't. :)

OWL - The weather is freaking *perfect* here for walking and running. I'll be damned if I can remember where you are - somewhere in the Midwest? I can't find it on your blog. At any rate, this is one of my favorite times of the year. 'Cause, you know, the weather is a little cooler and the chick who runs around the lake with her boyfriend has finally decided to put on some clothes. it's about time.

Kiki - *huge blush*

SB Gypsy said...

Sounds like a GREAT weekend!