This is my second attempt to write today. First attempt stalled. Too much anger, too much desperation, too much animalistic grabbing of resources, too much incompetence, too much spin. I’m sick of it.
Not enough humanism. Not enough foresight. Not enough kindness. Not enough patience. Not enough hope.
I won’t go into details – the details make me physically ill. My heart and guts are screaming for these people, and I keep my silence most times, try to hold onto some sanity in this bullshit crazy fucked-up world we inhabit. I pray for these people to get some relief from the hell they are living through.
Our plant manager is showing his good side. Today he got everyone on days and first shift together and started talking about carpools, about using the bus system, about trying to conserve gasoline. Well and good. We could have done this years ago, but now the consequences of our own choices are staring us hard in the face. Some people are still looking away.
Brian and I have been carpooling for weeks now. Not having his own vehicle is making him a little tetchy, but it works pretty well for Duckie and me (brief schedule mishaps notwithstanding.) I’m the one at work without a car – you might think I’d be missing my independence, but I honestly don’t give two squats about it at the moment. At the moment I’m hoping we can do without a second car for a good long while. At the moment I’m thinking that a road trip anywhere is just silly and irresponsible, no matter how desperately we want to see our families. (And believe me, I’d love to see my father right about now, even if he is doped up on painkillers after his very successful surgery yesterday.)
Our plant manager talked about the gas shortages in the 70s. He talked about the rising fuel costs and how much it would impact us – dollars and cents kinda thing. He talked about the fuel delivery infrastructure, and how breakdowns in the pipelines and refineries might result in temporary fuel outages in some areas of the southeast. So the thought of traveling from here to anywhere beyond a gas tank radius seems kinda dangerous to me. I’d hate to run out of gas in, say, Burlington or Florence, with no means of refueling for God-only-knows how long. The last thing the world needs right now is one more person in trouble.